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In a review hot off the press, Deaf American Poetry: An Anthology, is praised not only as a book "that fills a void" but is also "a flagship contribution to American poetry as a whole." Get your hands on a copy and learn why its importance goes beyond the signing community! It is available at http://www.clercscar.com/books

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WHICH REMINDS ME
Raymond Luczak
Words: 522
[Response to "Blueberries"]

(Editor's Note: Readers are invited to suggest a thing, person, place, event, or concept for Raymond Luczak to write about. You can suggest anything--up to three words--and send it to editor@clercscar.com and Raymond will pick one to respond to each week.)

When I was growing up, they always struck me as special. It's not as common or popular as strawberries or raspberries, and usually more expensive, but the berry's flavor, falling on the tart side of sweetness, has always felt like home on my tongue.

***

When my mother asked me once what kind of cake I wanted for my birthday, my request made it clear that I was a different child. Everyone always wanted something like angel food cake, strawberry shortcake, or Betty Crocker's Devil's Food chocolate cake. But I did not want cake.

I said, "Blueberry pie."

She made it with canned blueberries, which is not what I'd use now. I don't remember what my family thought of my choice, but I was very happy with my slice of pie.

***

I cradle these morsels of emotion bursting, bleeding purple, all over my palms after I've rinsed them. Every summer, when these babies are in season, I make blueberry pies with oatmeal crust. Sometimes, if the fruit is cheap enough, I'll make two of them at the same time.

Worse, I lose all logic when it comes to devouring my pies. Because the blueberries are covered in powdered sugar and bits of orange--and sometimes lemon--zest, there is almost no residual syrup. I can never decide which I like more--the baked berries or the oatmeal cookie-like crust. So when I carve a slice and put it on my plate, I often lose the battle of keeping the edges of the remaining pie straight. If there's a slight bump or an errant berry on the edge of crust, I have to pick at it. Of course, the hack results in another uneven line. I end up eating far more than I should. (You can find Tom Steele's recipe for Blueberry Pie with an Oatmeal Crust at http://tinyurl.com/lbbvd3.)

But it's my favorite breakfast food. Extravagant, I know, but at least this vice is a bit healthier than whiskey and cigarettes.

I am grateful that blueberries are in season for a month, or I'd gain a spare tire's heft around my waist in no time at all. The shortness of its season requires that I appreciate each burst of tart tenderness in my mouth even more. I rarely buy blueberries out of season; they don't taste as explosive.

***

I have never gone blueberry picking. But I am afraid that if I ever do, I will end up stuffing my mouth all day long. My sweet crime would be tattooed all over my hands, and the farmer would expect me to pay far more than my pitifully light bucket's worth. I am never a glutton, but for blueberries, I make an exception.

***

My ex-partner always said that I had the darkest blue eyes he'd ever seen. He called them my "blueberry eyes." I didn't quite believe him until another friend of mine, sitting across from me for lunch one day, stopped and leaned closer to look at my eyes.

"What?"

"I never realized how dark your eyes are. They're so blue!"

Maybe it's all those damn blueberry pies.

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Raymond Luczak is the author of eight books, the latest of which is Assembly Required: Notes on a Deaf Gay Life. His Web site is at http://www.raymondluczak.com and six of his poems appeared in Deaf American Poetry, available at http://www.clercscar.com/books.

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